It was 09:25 hours when i landed Shamsabad Airport from Mumbai. As i emerged from the swank airport, my driver, Srinivas welcomed me with open arms.” Saar, its so nice meeting you again. I have a special liking for you. for your….” he gushed. “Chup!! “am not in good mood to listen to such glib talk” i snapped his talk. He fell silent. I regret having silenced him.

When i reached my office at Saifabad, i felt i need to talk. The question is to whom? The Great Love of My Life, but she’s as good as dead to me atleast for now, and hasn’t yet emerged as…..Yesterday she texted me “Ole. ka rn ti dn nya” but that became just a… which only reinforced my trepidation if not my fearful foreboding. How life can change in just one week! One day one is wonderful and spontaneous, and the next it’s like trying to resurrect the dead. I suppose that says it all.

At lunch break i visited Chakhei and co at Abids but found only Hrualai in their room. I lectured some career and reading tips and left for my office again.In my office two ICCR scholars were waiting for me for approval of their grant applications. But i requested them to come on 27th November. As i was sitting alone, Ulrich Scaffer poem “INTO YOUR LIGHT’ comes to my mind.

My life is full of apprehension
and i am engaged in a struggle
that takes all energy

Sometimes i am just hanging
on
inspite of myself
looking for signs
hoping for miracles

I am supposed that i am
that i am still here
in the middle of life

and i become aware of Grace